Monday, February 27, 2006
I missed D&D this weekend because I was rockin' out in G to the Uelph.
A couple of the players tried to explain what happened on Sunday, but one ran off to cry in the washroom, and the other just sat and giggled nervously.
It turns out that they located the diabolical cauldron of corruption that we were in the catecombs to destroy and formulated
"...a cunning plan!" explained our DM.
"Really...but aren't I the one that comes up with the cunning plans?" I pondered out loud.
"Yes, but they were trying to roleplay your character!"
He was far too amused for my liking. "What was the plan?"
"They took a quick rest, used up most of their spells to buff up the group..."
"Yes, then what?" I asked eagerly.
"They charged into the room full of monsters and let loose!" he finished with glee.
"I died!" wailed our dwarven fighter.
"Don't worry, your cleric is doing just fine. We weren't sure what to do with you so we kept you in the back!" assured our weretiger ranger. "Most of your spells are gone since we spent them on buff spells and in the initial volley."
"I'm almost dead so you have to heal me on your first turn", came our mage.
"...So, how many monster are left?" I secretly reassured myself that they had my copied character sheet from last level...and with my dragon godling's powers, I would likely be able to finish off our mage with a deathknell spell and use the last of his life force to make good my escape.
"Um," started our DM, relishing the moment. "Two Charnel Hounds--"
My mind flew through the pages of the extended Monstrous Manuals and recalled a picture of an abysal hound composed of corpses towering over a poor human as it prepared to consume him and devour his soul forever.
He counted on his fingers, like it mattered, "...at least two Sorrowsworn Demons and Arrow Demons--"
Chaotic evil demons. My +23 to diplomacy won't help us now...
"...a Death Giant--"
What the shit were they thinking!?
"...aaaaaand the epic boss villain that made the cauldron. Oh, and at least one evil demi god that's allied with her."
"Oh," I managed. I pretended I had some work to do and quietly put my head down at my desk.
What was that acronym? TPK. Yes. Total Party Kill.
A couple of the players tried to explain what happened on Sunday, but one ran off to cry in the washroom, and the other just sat and giggled nervously.
It turns out that they located the diabolical cauldron of corruption that we were in the catecombs to destroy and formulated
"...a cunning plan!" explained our DM.
"Really...but aren't I the one that comes up with the cunning plans?" I pondered out loud.
"Yes, but they were trying to roleplay your character!"
He was far too amused for my liking. "What was the plan?"
"They took a quick rest, used up most of their spells to buff up the group..."
"Yes, then what?" I asked eagerly.
"They charged into the room full of monsters and let loose!" he finished with glee.
"I died!" wailed our dwarven fighter.
"Don't worry, your cleric is doing just fine. We weren't sure what to do with you so we kept you in the back!" assured our weretiger ranger. "Most of your spells are gone since we spent them on buff spells and in the initial volley."
"I'm almost dead so you have to heal me on your first turn", came our mage.
"...So, how many monster are left?" I secretly reassured myself that they had my copied character sheet from last level...and with my dragon godling's powers, I would likely be able to finish off our mage with a deathknell spell and use the last of his life force to make good my escape.
"Um," started our DM, relishing the moment. "Two Charnel Hounds--"
My mind flew through the pages of the extended Monstrous Manuals and recalled a picture of an abysal hound composed of corpses towering over a poor human as it prepared to consume him and devour his soul forever.
He counted on his fingers, like it mattered, "...at least two Sorrowsworn Demons and Arrow Demons--"
Chaotic evil demons. My +23 to diplomacy won't help us now...
"...a Death Giant--"
What the shit were they thinking!?
"...aaaaaand the epic boss villain that made the cauldron. Oh, and at least one evil demi god that's allied with her."
"Oh," I managed. I pretended I had some work to do and quietly put my head down at my desk.
What was that acronym? TPK. Yes. Total Party Kill.
