Monday, June 02, 2003
Lets talk about Americans and Klingons.
Americans and American policy want to be like the Federation. They want to be seen as a pure form of society, perfect in every way except for the evil wants of the individual.
Instead, they are like evil Klingons who have dishonoured their families and spend their time lashing out at everyone, especially those people who really are members of the Federation (France, Canada, Germany, various Neutral Countries).
Much like Klingons, they are a constant contradiction. They always lie and scheme, plot and murder, but at the same time they devote themselves to 'honour'...I'm afraid you can't do both. "A coward would show themselves in a true test of battle!"; then why do all Klingon ships have CLOAKING? How can the Americans bitch "That was so cowardly!" about the way the 9/11 attacks were carried out when they themselves spent several days shelling the shit out of Iraq (and not for the first time) from hundreds of miles away in complete safety?
Well, not complete safety. CNN reports that 20% of casualties suffered by the Empire...er, the Coalition were from friendly fire incidents. Since it's CNN, its always much worse than it actually sounds - I'd suggest closer to 50%. Ah, yes. There's a mighty war machine.
Oh, hey? What news has there been from those pilots that exploded several Canadians? They are still in court. Yep, the US wants us to forget about it. They keep shifting their story from pilot error to control tower error in order to keep anyone from being able to blame a specific reason for the attack. "We had to destroy any enemy of the Empire to keep our Honour intact!". The pilot's reasons for it was actually because they felt they were in 'danger'. You were in a supersonic-fucking-jet...you couldn't just FLY AWAY FROM GROUND TROOPS?
Lets call the Middle East "the Romulan Empire" for now. Those Klingons are always telling us they know that those damn evil Romulans are up to something; that they are honourless and shamefull and need to be wiped out! But then, we usually find out that some Romulans are working with some Klingons...it really isn't often that those Romulans are up to no good without help from the Klingons or from some other external force. Really, if we left them the fuck alone they probably wouldn't bother anyone.
But nope, this time its a matter of Honour. Lets ignore our Federation Allies and the Neutral Zone (the UN) and use our cloaking devices to penatrate deep into Romulan territory. Now that we're here, lets try and find out if they really have some of those 'secret weapons' that we KNOW they do. Afterall, those weapons could be cloaked. Those cowardly Romulans have cowardly cloaking devices!
How long has it been? I'm not sure how many days since the first attack on Iraq. Where is the reason Iraq was invaded? So far the CBC has reported that they found some barrels that "may have at one time" contained chemicals that "may have been" chemical weapons. I just hope they find those damn evil aluminum tubes soon!! You know? The ones that could be used for HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of different things....and also as part of making nuclear weapons.
Now that we've invaded Romulus and killed millions, shot a few of our own troops and ruined all the pathetic infrastructure that they managed to rebuild since the last time the Klingons invaded, the Klingons are changing their story. "Look at the evil squallor these poor Romulan children are living in! How could their Government allow this to happen! They have no Honour!". Well, lets pull a Janeway and fuck with the time travel:
Before Iraq was invaded the FIRST time: Governement aid was plentiful, rule was strong but there was much peace. People who didnt like it left. Those that didnt were branded Rebels and hunted down. OMG, the Klingons have never done that before, ever. Janeway, take us to the next time-space coordinates, please...
Iraq after being invaded the first time, to prior to being invaded the second time: Hospitals, schools, essencial institutions all fucked up. Embargos prevent important things, such as medicine and food being plentiful. Reconstruction takes years. Society finally recovers with massive help from the Government. Janeway, leave the Borg alone, and bring us to the present.
The Klingons blast holes in cities and then point and scream "No HONOUR! We're here to help you!" despite the fact that they are DIRECTLY responsible for the problems that are killing off Romulans by the hundreds each day.
I fear that I may have rambled a little.
Ofcourse, not all Klingons are bad. I know there's a few Worfs and Martoks out there, but, just like in the cold war, they get labeled as traitors and punished for not being a 'loyal' Klingon and constantly supporting their High Chancellor.
But what of the Federation? If the Klingons are right then we MUST be wrong! We don't want to go along with the Klingons because they are doing something EVIL that we don't agree with....well, its time for them to call us enemies because of it. "You have no Honour for not mindlessly following us into whatever we do! Filthy Pa'Tak!!"
I saw that as a real chance for Canada to step up and say "Fuck you, we aren't Mini-America.". Instead, all opponents of our Government decided to cash in on the easy chance to oppose our leader in public, even though the majority of them DONT SUPPORT THE US DECISION. They just wanted to be seen on Subspace Television saying for all to hear that Piccard was making a big mistake by staying out of this one.
In more recent news, Canada has reached over 30 deaths from SARS. The Americans laugh at us and say "Ha! We only have 27 deaths, our healthcare is SUPERIOR! No Americans should travel to Canada because they have the plague!". Really, most people suggest that the extreme screening flyers go through in US terminals is the major reason for their lack of infections. I'm so upset that their state of airport Martial Law has netted them fewer deaths.
And how about the cows? A single cow in the Prairies has been found with Mad Cow's Disease. They have slaughtered hundreds of cows and not found any more with it. And what's that? The Americans have stopped all import of beef from Canada? I hear big food chains like McDonalds will REALLY love that.
I fear I have rambled even more.
I think in some future posts I will turn on CNN and type what I see there. It should be extreme entertainment.
Americans and American policy want to be like the Federation. They want to be seen as a pure form of society, perfect in every way except for the evil wants of the individual.
Instead, they are like evil Klingons who have dishonoured their families and spend their time lashing out at everyone, especially those people who really are members of the Federation (France, Canada, Germany, various Neutral Countries).
Much like Klingons, they are a constant contradiction. They always lie and scheme, plot and murder, but at the same time they devote themselves to 'honour'...I'm afraid you can't do both. "A coward would show themselves in a true test of battle!"; then why do all Klingon ships have CLOAKING? How can the Americans bitch "That was so cowardly!" about the way the 9/11 attacks were carried out when they themselves spent several days shelling the shit out of Iraq (and not for the first time) from hundreds of miles away in complete safety?
Well, not complete safety. CNN reports that 20% of casualties suffered by the Empire...er, the Coalition were from friendly fire incidents. Since it's CNN, its always much worse than it actually sounds - I'd suggest closer to 50%. Ah, yes. There's a mighty war machine.
Oh, hey? What news has there been from those pilots that exploded several Canadians? They are still in court. Yep, the US wants us to forget about it. They keep shifting their story from pilot error to control tower error in order to keep anyone from being able to blame a specific reason for the attack. "We had to destroy any enemy of the Empire to keep our Honour intact!". The pilot's reasons for it was actually because they felt they were in 'danger'. You were in a supersonic-fucking-jet...you couldn't just FLY AWAY FROM GROUND TROOPS?
Lets call the Middle East "the Romulan Empire" for now. Those Klingons are always telling us they know that those damn evil Romulans are up to something; that they are honourless and shamefull and need to be wiped out! But then, we usually find out that some Romulans are working with some Klingons...it really isn't often that those Romulans are up to no good without help from the Klingons or from some other external force. Really, if we left them the fuck alone they probably wouldn't bother anyone.
But nope, this time its a matter of Honour. Lets ignore our Federation Allies and the Neutral Zone (the UN) and use our cloaking devices to penatrate deep into Romulan territory. Now that we're here, lets try and find out if they really have some of those 'secret weapons' that we KNOW they do. Afterall, those weapons could be cloaked. Those cowardly Romulans have cowardly cloaking devices!
How long has it been? I'm not sure how many days since the first attack on Iraq. Where is the reason Iraq was invaded? So far the CBC has reported that they found some barrels that "may have at one time" contained chemicals that "may have been" chemical weapons. I just hope they find those damn evil aluminum tubes soon!! You know? The ones that could be used for HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of different things....and also as part of making nuclear weapons.
Now that we've invaded Romulus and killed millions, shot a few of our own troops and ruined all the pathetic infrastructure that they managed to rebuild since the last time the Klingons invaded, the Klingons are changing their story. "Look at the evil squallor these poor Romulan children are living in! How could their Government allow this to happen! They have no Honour!". Well, lets pull a Janeway and fuck with the time travel:
Before Iraq was invaded the FIRST time: Governement aid was plentiful, rule was strong but there was much peace. People who didnt like it left. Those that didnt were branded Rebels and hunted down. OMG, the Klingons have never done that before, ever. Janeway, take us to the next time-space coordinates, please...
Iraq after being invaded the first time, to prior to being invaded the second time: Hospitals, schools, essencial institutions all fucked up. Embargos prevent important things, such as medicine and food being plentiful. Reconstruction takes years. Society finally recovers with massive help from the Government. Janeway, leave the Borg alone, and bring us to the present.
The Klingons blast holes in cities and then point and scream "No HONOUR! We're here to help you!" despite the fact that they are DIRECTLY responsible for the problems that are killing off Romulans by the hundreds each day.
I fear that I may have rambled a little.
Ofcourse, not all Klingons are bad. I know there's a few Worfs and Martoks out there, but, just like in the cold war, they get labeled as traitors and punished for not being a 'loyal' Klingon and constantly supporting their High Chancellor.
But what of the Federation? If the Klingons are right then we MUST be wrong! We don't want to go along with the Klingons because they are doing something EVIL that we don't agree with....well, its time for them to call us enemies because of it. "You have no Honour for not mindlessly following us into whatever we do! Filthy Pa'Tak!!"
I saw that as a real chance for Canada to step up and say "Fuck you, we aren't Mini-America.". Instead, all opponents of our Government decided to cash in on the easy chance to oppose our leader in public, even though the majority of them DONT SUPPORT THE US DECISION. They just wanted to be seen on Subspace Television saying for all to hear that Piccard was making a big mistake by staying out of this one.
In more recent news, Canada has reached over 30 deaths from SARS. The Americans laugh at us and say "Ha! We only have 27 deaths, our healthcare is SUPERIOR! No Americans should travel to Canada because they have the plague!". Really, most people suggest that the extreme screening flyers go through in US terminals is the major reason for their lack of infections. I'm so upset that their state of airport Martial Law has netted them fewer deaths.
And how about the cows? A single cow in the Prairies has been found with Mad Cow's Disease. They have slaughtered hundreds of cows and not found any more with it. And what's that? The Americans have stopped all import of beef from Canada? I hear big food chains like McDonalds will REALLY love that.
I fear I have rambled even more.
I think in some future posts I will turn on CNN and type what I see there. It should be extreme entertainment.
